“Happy Birthday.”

“Oh thank you.”

“Tell me old man. How have you managed to live so long? You are remarkably cheerful and youthful.”

“Being hopeless helps. Nobody asks you to do anything.”

“What about your diet?”

“ I always start the day with a fulfilling breakfast.”

“Oh, I’m a healthy eater. A bit of this and a bit of that.”

“None of that muck. I have a bacon wrap with cream cheese, tomato salsa and brown sauce…..every day.”

“I don’t believe you’ve survived such an onslaught on your body.”

“Perhaps the three cups of black coffee are the necessary antidote.”